The Birthday Party Rules You Need To Know

Rolando Talbott, dad & writer at Babble, knows all the rules. He's written a helpful guide for those of us who might be struggling with birthday party etiquette. For those of us who know the rules, it's fun reading that you might be tempted to send it out with your next party invitation.

I would have never guessed that there would be so many issues that had to be resolved at a toddler’s birthday party, AND I would have never guessed that all of this drama would come from the adults.

So here are the rules for birthday party guests:

If you do have kids:

1. The party is not an opportunity to get some free daycare, nor does it absolve you of your parental duties. It’s hard enough keeping kids entertained, let alone having to watch after your child.
2. And while we are on the subject, if you plan on having your other children attend and they were not specifically invited, make sure you seek permission from the host. Things can go downhill really fast if party favor bags have be rationed to make up for your Partridge-sized family.
3. Furthermore (assuming it’s a home party), this is NOT your house. It may be completely acceptable in your home for your children to jump on the couches and write on the walls, but treat the host’s house like you are at a museum.

I agree with most of these points. It's incredibly frustrating to discover that you've just been named daycare director and all the parents are skipping out on their duties for the day while you watch a dozen toddlers overdosed on refined sugar.

However, I don't agree with rule #2. Most of the time, I think it's just good manners to invite all the siblings and expect that they will attend. Is that old-fashioned of me?

So what if you're attending the party, but you don't have kids? You might not have to worry about committing any of the faux pas mentioned above, but there's a set of rules just for people without kids too.

If you do not have kids:

1. Lower your expectations about the presence of “adult beverages”. If this is a “must have” requirement for you, maybe you shouldn’t be attending a kid’s birthday party in the first place.
2. DO NOT ask the host for the wifi password unless it is a matter of National Security. If your Facebook status update is that urgent, maybe you should have taken care of that beforehand.

Simple enough right?

Remember:

A child’s birthday should be a cherished event for the child and their family. Although it is about fun, having a great time, and creating memories, how you behave as a guest can have a profound impact on the entire event.
Think about it like this: an invitation to a child’s birthday party is an offer to be a part of an intimate family gathering. Respect that, and it will be the best party ever!

Not sure what to do when the gifts are being opened? Unclear about whether or not you can bring your new beau to your niece's first birthday party? Read the rest of the rules at Babble to find out.