I’m The Worst Mother Ever!

Stephanie Jankowski, a writer for Huff Post Parents, has been in your shoes and mine! Here's what she has to say:

I hear her before I see her. She is grumbling under her breath because of her toddler's incessant cries. Someone obviously didn't give this mother the memo that crying is what little kids do. The child, holding onto the woman's leg, begs to be carried. “Up! Up!” her little voice says over and over. The woman actually seems angry that her own child wants to be held! Maybe this lady should try being a little more grateful. There are people all over the world who would kill for an adorable kid, a healthy kid — just a kid.

When I turn the corner, I finally catch a glimpse of this hot mess of a mother; there she is in full force, red face and crazy eyes. Noticing my glances, she tries to soften a bit, apparently embarrassed to have someone witness her tirade. Try as she might, she can't seem to contain the fury boiling just beneath the surface. She continues ignoring the beautiful children vying for her attention, opting to finish a text message instead.

Who could this woman be? She might be me… in that moment when I was exhausted and running late yet again, or last week when my son had a tantrum in the doctor's office, or at the grocery store when we just needed to get one thing and go home…. she could be any of use couldn't she? We're all guilty.

Afraid to look because of what I might see, I reluctantly make eye contact with the woman in the mirror. For a split second, I hear nothing. The room is deafening with silence. I look down at my baby, who is screaming because she's exhausted. I promise my sweet 4-year-old I'll help her connect the dots in her workbook just as soon as I clean up the water from her 6-year-old brother, who has, yet again, drenched the bathroom floor with his nightly shower antics.

Thank goodness, I can breathe a sigh of relief. It wasn't me. But we've all been there haven't we? Vowing to do better next time and sometimes we do and sometimes we totally drop the ball… again.

Although I haven't given them what they deserve today, they continue to give me exactly what I need. My children are innocence and understanding and tenderness. Even on my worst days, they don't hesitate to throw themselves into my embrace, instantly forgetting the anger and the way I've hissed at them. My children are unconditional love, even when I've unconsciously given them conditions. They are better than I could ever be, graceful with forgiveness and welcoming arms.

Wow. Isn't that the absolute truth? I'm so grateful for the mercy and forgiveness my children give me as I strive to be a better mom every day, even on the days when I'm “the worst mother ever.”  I don't always feel like I deserve their unconditional love, but they freely give it to me every day. Aren't our children totally amazing?

Want to read more encouragement from the worst mother ever? Check out Jankowski's article at Huff Post Parents. Then tell us about a time when you felt like the worst mom ever in the comment section.