7 Tricks To Help You Chill Out

Dr. Michele Borba, contributor to Today Parenting, recently wrote about 7 tricks that moms can use to chill out when we're really stressing.

After all, Borba notes that these days “stress” is nearly synonymous with “mom”.

Stressed? You're not alone. Apparently 70 percent of U.S. moms say mothering is “incredibly stressful.” And 96 percent also feel that we are far more stressed than our own mothers.

So what's triggering all that extra stress?

It's everything from financial insecurities, a more intensive parenting style and higher expectations for our kids’ success to a lack of support, time famine, relationship demands, and concern that the world is more perilous for kid raising.

Obviously we want to keep all this extra stress from having an effect on our children. So Borba suggests giving yourself a quick test to see if it's impacting them:

The home climate test: Is your home a place where you and your kids can de-stress? Are there laughs and time to enjoy each other’s company in a relaxed mode?

The mother memory test: If you asked your kids to describe you, would they say you are usually calm, take time to listen and are enjoyable to be around? Or running around, tense and stressed out?

The “mother memory” test makes me feel sad. I'm afraid my kids will remember me the way I remember my own mother behaving: lots of yelling and frazzled nerves, a bit too angry over small infractions. It takes a conscious effort to avoid that.

These tips help:

1. Learn your stress signs

Learning to identify how you react to stress will help you curb your overload mode. Tune in to your body until you identify your warning signs.

2. Take a break

You may not be able to avoid all the stress, but you can get away for just a few minutes to feel less overwhelmed. Giving yourself permission to take a brief “stress break” is often enough to decompress or just give a new perspective. This can include:

Taking a Mommy time out.

Give permission to “take ten.”

3. Create solutions for your “hot” times

Identify when you are most irritable, and find a simple way to curb the friction during that “hot” time.

4. Learn deep breathing or meditation

Deep abdominal breathing, meditation, and prayer are proven to help moderate stress and help the body relax.

5. Exercise together

Just walk: Walk alone, with your kids or find one other mom to join for a short walk each day.

Ride off the tension: There is nothing like riding bikes with your kids.

Dance stress away: A ten-minute spontaneous dance session with your kids is a great tension reliever.

6. Take time to laugh

The American Psychological Association reports that stressed people often hold a lot of stress in their faces. Laughs, smiles and giggles can help relieve some of that tension.

7. Find a support group

The truth is we devote so much time to our families, we forget to take time for our social needs, whether it's our significant other or our girlfriends. Relationships help reduce our stress and restore balance.

Being able to laugh about it (tip #6) is a big help for me when I'm stuck in the parenting trenches. It also helps to know you're not alone so tip #7, finding support is really important too.  Finally, taking breaks… even if they're only two minutes long, really helps me survive the week as a stay at home mom. Don't forget to take care of yourself.

For more stress busting tips, check out more helpful tricks from Today's Parenting page.