5 Foolish Thoughts I Had Before Having Kids

Let's face it, I'm a little bit of a know-it-all, and when it came to children, I was a huge chunk of a know-it-all. Having taught in elementary schools, private preschools and countless babysitting jobs while growing up, I thought I'd be pretty prepared for what would happen when I had children of my own. Boy, was I wrong!

Reflecting on this, here's my list of 5 things I foolishly thought before I had children:

1. I would instantly and easily fall into motherhood. As I mentioned before, I had been around children most of my life. So, of course, having my own would just be a beautiful extension of who I already was. Well, five years later, I could say that this is true, but not in the beginning. No, I was a hormonal mess with six weeks of postpartum depression. I worried about every thing I did and was constantly second-guessing myself! This did not come as easily as I conceived (no pun intended).

2. My children would obey my wishes… because I said so. Yeah, right! Isn't that a silly thought? My children were not created to look up to and adoringly love me and, therefore, do all that I say just because I am Mommy. No, they are highly-functioning, willful little smarties who have their very own independent minds. I must be very mindful of how I mother, taking into consideration who they are today and who we want them to be in the future. It is a very intentional act of love that is absolutely exhausting! Still, obeying Mommy and Daddy is our desire, but no, it does not come naturally.

3. Everyone would instantly be enamored with my children and me as their mother. (Yes, I know I am sounding mighty narcissistic. Truth is, I really was. Having children has taught me a lot about giving up myself.) Sadly, this misconceived idea did not go away as soon as we had our first baby. We thought she was just amazing, smart, beautiful and a true delight. Which she is! But not everyone else has to think so. We finally had some friends (who didn't have children at the time) point out – when she was about two-and-a-half – that not everything has to be about our daughter. Ouch! What a true statement and a real eye opener. That may be why our first daughter thinks the world revolves around her and why our second's just happy to be along for the ride.

4. I had to get off the phone with my sister whenever her children needed her. I now realize, as a mother of two, that if I got off the phone every time my children talked to me, I wouldn't ever talk to anyone! It's like children are phone magnets! “What, you're on the phone? Well, I haven't needed you or even talked to you in, like, ten minutes, but oh, boy, do I need you now! I said, NOW!”

5. I would still have sex regularly with my husband. Well, we do our best, but this is a toughie. For all you moms out there, this goes without explanation. For all you mommies-yet-to-be, you'll learn…

Written By: Lisa Liebling