Why potty training might not be right for you

Schedules

I thought I could just block off three days to stay at home all day and get it knocked out. That’s what at least a hundred different internet articles suggest. There’s a big problem with this for us. We are too busy. No, I can’t just cancel everything for three days. I did try. Really, I did. 

I’m a teacher. That means I work many more hours than I get paid for. It means I’m on the clock even when I’m not. It means I’m busy educating other kids on top of mothering my own. If you’re busy like I’m busy, maybe you just don’t have time for potty training right now. 

I refuse to freak out about it. I refuse to feel like a bad mom because I don’t have time for potty training right now. My grandmother says one of her regrets is that she pushed her kids and she should have just saved herself the stress. I’m learning from her mistake. No stress here. It will happen when it happens. Hopefully it happens before he goes off to college, but it will happen when it happens.

Stress

I like to stay busy. The life I lead is a full one and I love it. At times, it keeps me pretty stressed out. I don’t need the extra thing to stress about. When we were potty training, I was under a lot of stress. I had set a time limit. I had read all the advice. I was following strict “Potty Training Bible” rules. I was convinced it would lead to success.  All it led to was a strong desire to binge watch Netflix while drinking my favorite wine and eating chocolate truffles.

I don’t need that stress in my life right now. I have enough stress to deal with. The potty training thing can wait. It’s just not going to work for us right now. 

Not ready

There are some pretty great checklists online that help you know when your kid is ready to potty train. My son was showing all the classic signs. He started hating diaper changes, asking to use the potty, and staying dry all night long. He wasn’t really ready though, because after weeks of trying he still only did it about half the time. Also, any time he was with my husband or a caregiver, he regressed.  

The “is your child ready?” articles are great, but what I really need is a checklist for determining if my husband is ready. Currently, he loses his mind if our son has an accident on the leather couch. How difficult is it to wipe off a leather couch with some bleach wipes? Yep, not ready. 

If you’re not ready, don’t worry. It will happen. It’s not a race. There isn’t a retirement bonus for parents who get their children potty trained by age 2…or 3….or any age really.  Relax. You’ll get there.

Written by: Sara Parise