This Is What Happened When One Ex-Couple Threw Away Their Custody Agreement

What do you think of this idea?

Every other weekend.
Wednesdays from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m.
Christmas on even years.
Thanksgiving on odd years.
30-day extended visitation in the summer.
Spring break every other year.
No moving out-of-state.
30 days notice with a job change or move.
Child support.
Child support review every 4 years.
Insurance provision.
Split copays.We were exhausted after the first year of trying to follow along with each detail. Details that were somewhat standard and very general to accommodate a broad span of families. Details that were permanent and signed by a judge. Details that never changed, even when our lives did.

Following these instructions laid out for us made us tired, angry and confused.

We were tired of times and dates and who has her when and what time she needed to be where and on and on. We were angry because of expectations that seemed impossible. We couldn't always get her by 6 p.m. or drop her off by 8 p.m., life just doesn't work like that and occasionally you're late or early or can't do it at all. We were confused because it's a mess.

Have you seen a custody agreement? There's such a division of time and dates that your calendar is so marked up it looks like a two-year-old got ahold of it with box of markers.

Our custody agreement was stressing us out, making us miserable and was causing us to argue. It was crippling the need for us to figure out how to work together as a team.

So we threw it out.

Chunked it.

Shredded it into a million pieces.

Burned it at the stake.

We got rid of it!

We've never looked back, not once.

Instead of being controlling jerks, we decided to give each other some slack and truly stop to think about what was best for our little girl.

Our entire relationship changed after that. The dynamics of co-parenting made a positive switch and we became better parents and better friends. Our daughter became happier and we were all less stressed.

When we threw out the papers we communicated better and developed compassion and understanding towards each other.

We took the time to listen to each other and find out what worked in each of our families. We stepped outside the box and created our own custody agreement that basically say that she's equally both of our daughter. If she's with him or me, she's with family and that's what matters.

We decided to simply share in the joy of raising our little girl together and to see each others relationship with her as equally important as our own.

You can see the rest of what they have to say on Huff Post Life Handbook. When you're finished, leave a comment and share your thoughts on what they did.