If I Have To Tell You One More Time……

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On the flip-side, I'm sure my kid will tell you that she is just as tired of me on repeat. “I've heard that before, Mom.  I'm not stupid” is a common refrain from her.  I can guarantee if you're not there already, you will get the same treatment from your children.

Dear Children,
It is evidently still a mystery to you how the world works, so I'm going to let you in on a secret: We do the same thing every day. It's the way the world works. It's the human condition. People have been bemoaning this since the dawn of time. That’s why the movie Groundhog Day was popular even though it was essentially not very good: We do the same thing every day.

I tell you this not because I want to bog you down in philosophy, but because I am tired. Since you do not yet seem to have noticed that this is the case, you forget how to take care of yourselves and/or fight having to do the basic steps each day. Imagine if — I know this is a stretch — you simply DID WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO WITHOUT 10 REMINDERS AND SIX FIGHTS.

Wouldn't it be a huge relief to tell your children ONCE and have them do what you ask them to?  Ah, dare to dream!!

So here we go:
1. Wake up. Though you fought me last night about going to bed, now you don't want to leave bed. It’s too cold. I get it. You're tired — I get it. You had a long day of doing the same stuff yesterday. But please. Just get out of bed. Like you do on weekends at 5:30 a.m.
2. Put clothes onto your body. This seems to stump you, so I'll break it down. It will make your day better if you choose clothing that fits you and will be comfortable. But if you don't want to, that's OK. The misery you feel in your November shorts and size 2T T-shirt at 10 a.m. will be someone else's problem. You should be sure you have an upper-body garment, a lower-body garment, and, later, some foot items. Socks, coats, and underwear are just icing at this point.

Is everything a battle?  Is everything a war?

3. Put food into your body. It's probably going to be the same food you had yesterday. That is all I am capable of making when someone woke me up crying about urine at 3 a.m. Since you aren't fully awake yet, stop acting like you care whether it’s Chex or Cheerios. I would not fight you on this step except for the simple fact that I care about your teacher, and I cannot unleash your blood-sugar low on her.
4. Brush your hair. Brush your teeth. Or don't — it's your social life. But this too must be redone each day.

Apparently, yes.  Read on at The Stir for the rest of the list. If you think of one that the list doesn't cover, comment and let us know.

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