Don’t Ask Me To Take A Break

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Today you asked me again. “Do you want a break? Because I’ll be so glad to take him so you can take a break? Why don’t you take a break?” Today you wouldn’t let me have my son. You wouldn’t let him out of your arms until I walked to my room and changed my clothes. I must have looked uncomfortable in my black dress and tight shoes. I’m sure my eyes looked a little tired from a long stressful day at work.  

I don’t want to take a break.  I know you are just trying to help. I know you believe you are doing the right thing and it’s such a nice gesture…in your head. That’s why I clench my teeth and walk down the hallway instead of demanding that you hand over my child. I am a little tired and I know there’s cleaning to be done and dinner to be fixed. My feet hurt, but so does my heart. I have spent all day working while you have been here holding my baby. You have comforted him, you have loved him, and you have fed him all day. I am so grateful for that. But now I am home and the thing I need more than anything is to hold my sleeping child and kiss his smooth forehead. I have been longing to smell his baby scent, feel the weight of his body in my arms, and see his big brown eyes staring back at me all day long. 

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